Posted by: classyjacksonville | June 20, 2008

Where is Jacksonville?

Jacksonville, North Carolina is a little known corner of a little place I like to call America. Jacksonville is most famous for being the home of the marine corps base, Camp Lejeune, which was founded in 1941 slightly before our entrance into the second world war. Before construction of Camp Lejeune, Onslow county had remained stagnant at about 12,000 people since the beginning of the twentieth century and Jacksonville was little more than a small 800 person village on the banks of the New River (and it probably would have stayed that way too). However, construction of Camp Lejeune boosted the town and the economy and since then the citizens of Jacksonville having been leeching off marines and their steady source of income.

Jacksonville is one of country’s youngest cities in America, which you would think to be an advantage, until you start to realize that it isn’t (I checked that list, Provo, Utah, home of Brigham Young University is number two, apparently being young doesn’t make your town cool). Jacksonville suffers from an horrendous guy-girl ratio, for every 100 females over the age of 18, there are 178.6 males. Not that those 100 females (if you can find them) are even worth looking at. Most likely they’re some cracked out Jazebel plying her profession at the Driftwood or La Mirage, a delicious looking overweight “Defender of the Free World” eating at the Golden Corral, an inbred “dirt person,” or an overweight marine wife chowing down on waffles and corn beef hash at the Waffle Shoppe with 3 buzz cut kids in tow. So if you’re a young, male between the ages of 18 and 23 (which is pretty much 80% of the Marine corps and two thirds of Jacksonville) you’ll have better luck with a swampy cockroach infested hole in your barracks room wall or at Pure Golds Crazy Horse. Or you can marry your high school sweetheart and move her out here, only to have her balloon up eating at the Cracker Barrel twice a day, and soon after she affixes a half my heart is Iraq sticker and you leave to go fight in desperate combat against the mohamadean in foulest arabia, she sends you pictures of her losing weight and tanning, and you return to find her throwing swingers parties at your on base enlisted housing in Tarrawa Terrace. Either way, you’re fucked.

Jacksonville is the stereotypical military town and a confluence of all that is horrible about America. Not that it would be that bad a place to live, except the all pervasive and polluting influence of the military has destroyed it. If not for the marine corps, Jacksonville most likely would have been a nice,small town and county seat at the intersection of highway US 17 and state highway 24 in the swamps of eastern North Carolina. Granted, I wouldn’t have wanted to have lived here (God smiting the original english settlers with Sir Walter Raleigh not far from Jacksonville at Roanoke Island leaving only the word Croatan is enough proof for me that Jesus didn’t want people living here) but some people might and those people probably wouldn’t have been half bad. Maybe.



  1. America

  2. You don’t get it. You don’t even care to get it. And I don’t care if you ever do get it. My family hails from Jacksonville (4 generations) and all of us are damn proud of it. You describe Jacksonville as being full of ugly, non-educated, slutty people (women) who are only out for one thing- to get the Marine Corps money. If you think this is a false statement, then re-read your own article above. But, the truth of the matter is, my friend, this community is low in crime, middle in prosperity and high in kindness. We live here because we want to- you apparently live here to fulfill an obligation. If you had seen our town 30 years ago you would jump for joy at the new surroundings- and yes, even the mall. I feel sorry for you. Maybe you need to relax and go back to your own hometown and stop giving mine such a bad rep! Your ignorance is just as bad as your attitude. Keep reporting all of your bad vibe, it will not make you a better person- no matter what. Oh, and the only employment you mention in your article for the women of this town include stripping. Are you serious? You should know that it is not the women OF Jacksonville- it is usually the women BROUGHT TO Jacksonville and then left here to either 1) fend for themselves or 2) fill their time waiting for hubby to get back. Check yourself and stop stereotyping.

  3. I can see how Proud Jville Woman was offended, and I would also like to know what part of Classy Jacksonville she lives in. I have been in this town for 4 years and 2 months and everything that has been said in this article is quiet accurate. I have experienced my High School SweetHeart having tons of fun with the locals while I am gone defending our country. So I became a statistic when I got divorced. I think I brought the divorce rate up to 87% with mine. Sorry about that Jacksonville… Also the crime is actually very high here for such a small town. 3 weeks ago my house was broken into and everything was stolen out of it. THe police then told me that there have been over 50 break-ins in the last 2 weeks. Also my car was stolen, (who steals a car…honestly), then when I finally got it back, someone broke into it and stole my CD player. Also the kindness levels in classy jacksonville are not high. My sister just moved here for Memphis Tennessee (3rd highest crime rate in the United States) and said to me that the people here are more rude than they are in Memphis. That honestly shocked me because she came from a very ghetto community. I did an experiment once and let my hair grow out and then explored the area. I noticed that people were a lot more friendly to me and opened doors for me. Then I went and got my marine corps special haircut and did the same activities I did the day prior. I got doors closed on me and no smiles (the Mean Mug did occur). I guess you can say I have become another statistic by agreeing with this whole site and enjoying the use of the first Amendment being used at its greatest.

    P.S. I will try to keep the reving, speeding, and occasional mean mugging to a minimal while in my mustang.

    • I agree with Dissown. Proud J-ville woman, don’t take stuff on the internet so seriously and personal. Obviously not everyone in JAX is like that, but i avoid it like the plague for those very reasons.

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